no. wait. yes?

LOL THAT IS WHAT I MEANT THANKS GOOGLE

Tue, 06 Mar 2012 21:30:09 -0500

LOL THAT IS WHAT I MEANT THANKS GOOGLE

Possible reasons I changed my twitter name to 'mrjohnmorrow' from 'johnmorrowsr'

Tue, 14 Feb 2012 06:16:10 -0500

My “son” ran back to his real parents
My daughter made it through three days of kindergarten before she insisted she change her name
I had a miscarriage
I finally started taking my anti-psycotics and realized the headless doll I was talking to wasn’t my 6 year old son. Also, he was named “Joe”.
People didn’t find it funny that johnmorrowjr is was actually just how I referred to my genitalia. Or that I tried to enroll him in kindergarten.

Regards,

John

Video

Fri, 25 Nov 2011 23:08:29 -0500

I thought of a couple for this one (#306): “The lease only...

Thu, 13 Oct 2011 04:22:03 -0400

I thought of a couple for this one (#306):

“The lease only said not to throw stones…Ha! And the landlord called it ‘airtight.’”

“So, what’s for desert?

The Funhouse

Thu, 07 Apr 2011 03:24:00 -0400

The Funhouse is a Seattle punk venue where I recently saw Dom play. The show was great, and so I decided to check out who was playing there next. Just a few of the artists coming in the next few months:

Poop

Matt Taggart (aka Pop Culture Rape Victim)

Victoria’s Secretion

The F-holes

Wet Nightmare

Poop Attack [no relation to Poop]

Butts

Sperm [same night as Butts!]

Photo

Mon, 07 Mar 2011 03:05:00 -0500

maxsitt: My hat’s off to this guy. I can’t imagine what it must...

Wed, 23 Feb 2011 23:33:36 -0500

maxsitt:

My hat’s off to this guy. I can’t imagine what it must be like to have this kind of patience. The song is “Eple” by Röyksopp if you’re curious (a pretty cool video in it’s own right).

Ghostface on Drake

Mon, 14 Feb 2011 05:04:16 -0500

Ghostface on Drake:

Through relentless simile, Ghostface Killah elucidates his objections towards Drake and his recent success. A few of the topics he touches on:

Burundi flannel
Linen thread count
Bar mitzvahs
Gorilla/chicken co-habitation
Eating bark off trees
Slapping kids
The environmental advantages of lion-drawn chariots over automobiles (and other ways to reduce your “carbon footprints and shit”)

Ghostface is clearly trying to be witty here, but its not clear how intentional the depth of his humor is. Nonetheless, his post is a hilarious must-read.

Google Art Project

Thu, 03 Feb 2011 03:49:00 -0500

Google Art Project:

Incredible. Extremely high quality art from museums all over the world. You can go explore the MoMa (in Google StreetView fashion) and then click over and explore the Tate Modern in a matter of seconds. All of the picture quality is great, but on some of the paintings its phenomenal. In Starry Night, you can see the height of Van Gogh’s brush strokes. In The Bedroom, the oil paint even looks greasy. A few others to check out:

The Birth of Venus

The Princess from the Land of Porcelain

Chris Ofili’s No Woman No Cry - check it out “in darkness”

maxsitt: Chromeo - You’re So Gangsta I don’t know what to say...

Tue, 01 Feb 2011 00:44:03 -0500

maxsitt:

Chromeo - You’re So Gangsta

I don’t know what to say about this song other than it’s probably the best thing ever. Just having the song pop up when I’m shuffling through my ipod is enough to bring a smile to my face. This electro-funk-hip hop-house cut from their first album isn’t especially representative of Chromeo’s music, but it’s awesome nonetheless. Also, do yourself a favor and see these guys live—not only are they, in all likelihood, the two coolest guys on the planet, but they bring along tons of energy, a seizure-inducing light show, and tight musicianship.

The Razzies

Thu, 27 Jan 2011 22:55:02 -0500

I hate 3D, but I love the fact the Razzies added a new category this year:

Worst Eye-Gouging Use of 3D
‘Cats & Dogs 2: Revenge Of Kitty Galore’
‘Clash of the Titans’
‘The Last Airbender’
‘Nutcracker 3D’
‘Saw 3D’

“I only watch Skins for the indie music” I’m...

Tue, 25 Jan 2011 03:01:00 -0500

“I only watch Skins for the indie music”

I’m not try to fool anyone here - the above statement is a boldface lie. I first watched Skins after controversy arose in which the show, despite having no nudity, was accused of being child porn. This was seemingly nonsensical enough to warrant a viewing, and that fast rate at which both the characters were introduced and the indie rock/pop favorites of yesteryear (2010) were sampled hooked me in. Take a look at the track listing for the first episode.* Phantogram, Twin Sister, Animal Collective, The Drums - and that’s only the first few artists I recognized.

However, as I ignominiously admitted above, I like this show. It’s basically like my high school experience (especially the snow), except people are actually getting laid. All the rockstar-esque drugs, drinking, and petty crime these kids partake in would be kinda pathetic if there weren’t beautiful girls involved (and let me tell you, it was). Some of the minor plot lines are a bit ridiculous, but for the most part, the show does a pretty good job of creating a reality and staying within its confines. It’s only a matter of time before I get used to the fast pace of the show and start noticing all of its blatant flaws, but in the meantime, I’m going to sit back, shut my brain down, and enjoy the shit out of it.

(Click through the picture above to watch the show commercial free (AFAIK) on mtv.com)

*I was really surprised to even find anything to do with music on MTV’s website, let alone a track list full of indie music.

Ricky Gervais’s opening monologue at the Golden Globes in...

Thu, 20 Jan 2011 03:49:00 -0500

Ricky Gervais’s opening monologue at the Golden Globes in a nutshell: Zing!

No seriously Max, this isn’t your average DListed nonsense - this is hilarious.

Update: Some background - there are some persistent and partially substantiated rumors that John Travolta and Tom Cruise are gay.

Travis Morrison, lead singer of The Dismemberment Plan, is...

Tue, 11 Jan 2011 06:07:34 -0500

Travis Morrison, lead singer of The Dismemberment Plan, is probably the first and last person ever to get both a Pitchfork Perfect 10 and a Pitchfork Perfect 0.

Oh wait, I could totally see this happening to Kayne too.

cutest cover of "home"

Thu, 06 Jan 2011 03:30:22 -0500

cutest cover of "home":

catchysongoftheday:

catchylinkoftheday:

probably ever?

Definitely ever. Embed goodness below.

Magic 3d Pictures

Tue, 21 Dec 2010 17:46:00 -0500

Magic 3d Pictures:

Warning: This made my eye hurt.

"Nailed it." (martha stewart peppermint icicles)

Tue, 21 Dec 2010 16:48:46 -0500

"Nailed it." (martha stewart peppermint icicles):

catchylinkoftheday:

this is hilarious to me. see the original post on reddit.

Super-duper like of the day:

Tue, 21 Dec 2010 03:57:55 -0500

zackmast:

I’ve spent the entire day keeping humble about this, but I do have to say it feels exhilarating to be published in a legitimate outlet — to have my writing hand-picked, amidst competition, and prominently displayed to literate hipsters everywhere.

For better or worse, I spend so much of my time being self-conscious about what I want to do, and getting a piece in McSweeney’s feels less like validation than relief. I can stop being a self-professed writer now and start being a writer. Hey, man, I could never write another thing and just ride this wave for fifty years, and heck I probably will.

Back in sixth grade, I found out about the annual writing contest sponsored by my local library. First prize was fifty bucks — a new video game! — and I figured I’d give it a shot. For lack of any other ideas, I wrote a short, semi-autobiographical story about my uncle’s death and funeral. I can’t remember the details now — I wish I’d kept it — but I know the story was authentic enough that I refused to let my family read it.

Well, I won, and I immediately went out and bought Rogue Leader. I was young, and all I could focus on was that fifty dollar bill in that envelope and all its immediate gratification. It never dawned on me that writing could be even more gratifying for even longer — potentially for a lifetime.

The next year, I didn’t enter, and I didn’t bother the year after that, or after that — or ever, actually. I graduated high school without submitting another story. Maybe I was afraid to. What if I lost? Any amount of money — even enough to buy Rogue Leader II: Rebel Strike — wasn’t worth facing the cold, crippling humiliation of second place.

But it’s not about contests, is it? It’s about writing something because you want to, because your uncle suddenly dies and the only way you know how to deal with that is by convincing yourself to enter a writing contest “for the money.” Then years later, you write something because it’s fun and might make a funny piece for your stupid blog, and on a whim you submit it to a website who publishes it and doesn’t offer you a dime. And it’s the best feeling in the world.

Just said fudge instead of fuck. I don’t even know who I am anymore.

Wed, 15 Dec 2010 02:30:31 -0500

Just said fudge instead of fuck. I don’t even know who I am anymore.

DESCRIBE YOUR LAST SEXUAL EXPERIENCE USING A FILM TITLE.

Sat, 11 Dec 2010 18:29:40 -0500

bottomlocker:

zackmast:

drewkaufman:

scissorandglue:

rustycunt:

elliottsmelliott:

teenagenemanurse:

completelytruestory:

immastabyouwitaspork:

savagemike:

jasencomstock:

notthatkindagay:

sam-pop:

Bounce.

Toy Story.

alien vs. predator

“Dazed and Confused”

Gone in 60 Seconds.

The Hangover.

hairy potter

There Will Be Blood

Tupac: Resurrection

Temple of Doom

Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience

28 Weeks Later

Inception

Baby’s Day Out